Dear Nicole,
I have watched ‘Elena Undone’ several times and wanted to tell you that it was so beautifully done and to thank you for bringing it to fruition.
I am going to be 78 years old next month and have spent my whole life trying to hide the fact that I am a lesbian…that is, I have never admitted it outright. That does not mean that the way I’ve lived my life has not given almost everybody pause to wonder about my preferences.
I have been with my partner for 36 years now, the last 21 living together (as we tell others, as old lady roommates). She was a woman living in an abusive marriage with 3 children, one of whom was a mentally sick daughter who has since been institutionalized for the last 30 years. Before I met her, I was a Nun…principal of the school her children went to, but met her after I had left the convent. Your movie could have been about us as that is how we fell for each other from day one. It was more than just a romance as she desperately needed what I brought to her in her time of so much family trouble…a person who really cared to help her through all these struggles.
We didn’t actually move in together for another 15 years.
So it’s with a feeling of relief that I can say this to you as the only outsider, besides my doctor, whom I have shared this with. At this point in my life, I don’t see it as necessary to verbalize the obvious with others, but I have for many years not allowed myself to be intimate with my partner. I guess, if I didn’t do ‘that’ then I could safely live my lie. She understood that it was a strange quirk of mine that after several years of intimacy, I turned it off. What a shame to have had to try to deny what was so beautiful. I tell her every day that I love her and she to me, so you see, even old ladies still have it! I can still watch the movie and savor the closeness and the eye connections and relive those feelings. When my time comes to die, I can say that I am not ashamed to be gay.
In my early years, I never thought of a label to describe myself and never thought there were so many gay people in the world.
So, thank you for creating such a beautiful and truthful story and having the actors to make it so believable.
(I feel like I have been to confession!!!!)
Sincerely,
Monica Saksefski